10:16am

Thu August 14, 2014
Ask Me Another

'Thong Song' Gone Wrong

Originally published on Thu May 7, 2015 2:29 pm

You've never heard Sisqo's notorious 2000 hit "Thong Song" quite like this. We've rewritten the lyrics to be about other things that rhyme with "thong"...tha thong thong thong.

Heard in Episode 324: His Dark Material

Copyright 2015 NPR. To see more, visit http://www.npr.org/.

Transcript

OPHIRA EISENBERG, HOST:

You're listening to ASK ME ANOTHER from NPR and WNYC. I'm Ophira Eisenberg. And with me is our one-man house band Jonathan Coulton and our puzzle guru John Chaneski.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: So this next game is called "Thong Song Gone Wrong."

(LAUGHETR)

EISENBERG: And to play it, please welcome our contestants Sid Watal and Lara Gallagher.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Welcome to you both. Now, I don't know if you remember the "Thong Song" in your life.

SID WATAL: Oh, I do.

EISENBERG: You do?

WATAL: Oh, I do.

EISENBERG: OK good, Sid. I couldn't remember when it came out, but it was 2000. That was our millennium touch point. Do you remember where you were New Year's Eve when it - we became?

WATAL: I can almost guarantee I was in my parents basement.

EISENBERG: Sid, you were in your parents basement?

WATAL: I'm pretty sure. I'm pretty sure.

EISENBERG: Do you know what you were doing in your parents basement?

WATAL: Listening to the "Thong Song."

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: That is perfect for this game. Lara?

LARA GALLAGHER: I was visiting my older sister at college.

EISENBERG: And did you have a good time?

GALLAGHER: I was - I brought a friend, I remember. And she had a really good time.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: That sums up so many of my weekends, New Year's, birthdays. Other people seem to be enjoying themselves. Jonathan, how did you spend New Year's Eve 1999-2000?

JONATHAN COULTON: I was in a bunker. I was there for 43 days because of the Y2K bug. I just thought it was safest.

EISENBERG: That you were trying to release?

COULTON: Yeah, that's right.

EISENBERG: All right, Jonathan, what are we putting these poor contestants through?

COULTON: Well, it's going to be fun. For this game we are setting all of our questions to the music from arguably the greatest song in history - the "Thong Song." And as you might imagine, all of the answers will rhyme with thong - and technically also song. And I hope that you ring in quickly with the right answers because I want to get this over with as fast as possible.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: (Singing) 72 things got real hot, when Atari put gamers on the spot, playing tennis just by turning a knob to the game screen said game over.

JOHN CHANESKI: Rhymes with thong.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: Atari.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Sid.

WATAL: Pong?

COULTON: Pong is correct.

(APPLAUSE)

GALLAGHER: OK, OK.

EISENBERG: Did you ever play that in your parents basement?

WATAL: Yes. Oh yeah.

COULTON: Strangely, pong unaffected by the Y2K bug.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: It was fine. It's because there are better graphics on your microwave.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: Right. (Singing) Southern California comedy was the ride. Dave's not here man, don't come inside. Can't you squares just take a joke, is your love of this duo up in smoke?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Sid.

WATAL: Cheech and Chong?

COULTON: You got it.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: (Singing) He wrote a little red book, book, book. China's like what, what, what, kicked imperialist butt, butt, butt. I think he was a chairman.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Sid?

WATAL: Mao Zedong.

COULTON: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Sid, what color was his thong?

WATAL: Obviously red.

EISENBERG: Yeah, exactly. Isn't it fun just thinking about that?

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: I'm not having a lot of fun thinking about it. (Singing) This guy said I'm a Mac, Mac, Mac. Hodgeman's like what, what, what. Apple sales were strong. This actor's name is.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Lara.

GALLAGHER: Justin Long.

COULTON: (Singing) Justin Long. That's right.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: (Singing) This ditty hit big across the land from Rivers Cuomo's alternative band. But the title doesn't make it sound so fun, even wizard admits they've come undone.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Lara.

GALLAGHER: "Sweater Song?"

COULTON: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: You sound so sad, Lara. It is a sad song.

GALLAGHER: Yeah, I don't know where I went.

COULTON: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

GALLAGHER: Back to 2000, you know?

EISENBERG: Yeah. I'm looking at you and I'm like, I feel like I'm just part of Lara's dream right now.

GALLAGHER: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

EISENBERG: Like you dreamt this show.

GALLAGHER: There's a lot there, you know?

EISENBERG: And it's weirder than I think both us thought the dream would be, right?

GALLAGHER: Yeah, yeah.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

(LAUGHTER)

COULTON: (Singing) A syllable with two vowel sounds. Move your lips and tongue and say round, round. If you don't know, you're about to learn. Can you name this grammatical term?

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Sid.

WATAL: Diphthong.

COULTON: Diphthong, thong, thong, thong, thong. That's right.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: I never really thought about how sexy that grammatical term is 'till now.

COULTON: It's an earlier draft. All right, this is your last clue. (Singing) Won the Tour de France, France, France, was performance enhanced, enhanced, steroids are wrong. This cyclists name is.

(SOUNDBITE OF BELL)

COULTON: Sid.

WATAL: Lance Armstrong.

COULTON: Oh yeah.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Sid - he could've sung that, you know. Sid could've sung that.

COULTON: Its begging.

WATAL: (Singing) Let me see Lance Armstrong.

EISENBERG: Yeah.

(APPLAUSE)

COULTON: John Chaneski, how'd did we do in this game?

CHANESKI: Well, "The Thong Song Gone Wrong" went oh so right for Sid. Way to go Sid.

(APPLAUSE)

EISENBERG: Nice job, Sid. You are moving on to our Ask Me One More final round, coming at the end of the show.

(SOUNDBITE OF SONG, "THONG SONG")

SISQO: (Singing) That thong, thong, thong, thong, thong. Transcript provided by NPR, Copyright NPR.